What’s Your Midlife Self-Care Routine?

Self-care can look a little different in midlife.

While there’s nothing wrong with the timeless classics - a hot bath, a manicure, a face mask - your needs have likely changed in midlife as they reflect the changes happening to your body and hormones. As a result, your self-care rituals may need a bit of sprucing up as well.

Self-care is an important part of any wellness routine but sometimes it gets fluffed off as frivolous or is painted to look self-indulgent or meaningless. Not so. Self-care at its core is tending to your own personal needs to stay physically, mentally and emotionally well. 

Self-care promotes positive health outcomes so we live longer and are better equipped to handle stress.

For many of us, as younger women our stressors used to (and let’s face it, still can) look like long commutes to work or the frustrations of tending to the needs of young children. 

It’s undeniable that the demands of the workplace have changed. Work from home has become a more viable option and we’re not as busy climbing the proverbial ladder.

While we may not be spending as many hours commuting, the new face of business comes with its own stressors. Working from home can be isolating and many have grieved the loss of the camaraderie and collaboration of in-person office spaces. 

The pandemic has changed the reality of work for many with job loss at an all time high. Women in particular were hit hard. The financial stress of job loss in midlife, just as we’re saving for retirement, obviously takes a significant toll. Add to that the demands of taking care of aging parents doubled with the needs of adult children, and our plates are as full. 

Managing stress through self-care to keep our cortisol levels from skyrocketing is more important than ever. Cortisol is the queen hormone - and keeping her balanced is integral to balancing the hormones responsible for the perimenopausal symptoms we can experience at midlife.

Fitness and exercise are forms of self-care at their purest but intense cardio workouts no longer serve us in the same way in midlife and can have a negative effect on our cortisol levels. 

Switching to strength training helps prevent muscle mass loss and builds bone density. Yoga is a lovely, gentle form of movement that maintains our flexibility while keeping emotional stress levels under control. Bonus: a strong yoga practice can be continued through the second half of life!

Skin care is a feel good, luxurious way to practice self-care. In midlife, our delicate skin may need more TLC in the form of hydrating oils and lotions to restore the natural moisture we lose with age. Fine lines, firmness and dull skin can be a concern and we should choose products that address these issues. 

Our sex lives have undoubtedly changed as well. We may find ourselves in relationships that are decades old with comfort and familiarity taking precedence over fireworks and sexual chemistry. Add to that hormone decline that finds our delicate areas…well, more delicate. We may find the need to use lubricants or topical hormone gels to make sex more sexy.

But self-care can be as simple as a mindset reframe. Like saying yes to more joy or risk. Or indulging in inappropriate displays of affection. Or letting go of the nonsense and simply embracing the good stuff.

The bottom line is things will change and that’s okay. We may have to make adjustments or forge new pathways that support us in where we are now and where we need to go. The good thing is we’re not in it alone. We have communities like this where we can share our stories and our journeys. 

As Nanea Hoffman, the CEO of Sweatpants and Coffee wrote: “None of us are getting out of here alive, so please stop treating yourself like an afterthought. Eat delicious food. Walk in the sunshine. Jump in the ocean. Say the truth that you’re carrying in your heart like hidden treasure. Be silly. Be kind. Be weird. There’s no time for anything else”.

And that my friends, is the truth. This is your one life. Take good care of it.